So here we are, 4 months down the line and I’m as angry as ever. Anger is not a great emotion, and neither is the urge to throat punch everyone! But that’s how I feel…
The update is my husband has text to say he’s made a huge mistake. Seriously, I’m gobsmacked, whaaaaaaattttt the f………laming hell is wrong with him. Therein lies my first throat punch victim. No explanation, no lead up, no phone call, no conversation, just a text!
Lets just skip the next few angry days and weeks to when I said ok lets try again….seems as I never wanted to give up as easily as he did. So why do I really not care whether my marriage now works or not. There’s 2 explanations and the first one is I genuinely don’t care, all I wanted was for him to tell me he’d made a mistake, after all, this is the third time he’d done this and there’s only so much one person can take, even me. The other explanation is that he hasn’t managed to prove to me he really wants this to work. The reason I say this is that he whined like a wallflower about the state of our marriage prior to the break up, yet has ‘slotted’ right back in, as it was, and appears to think all is fine!!!
I wouldn’t say my husband was stupid, but I genuinely think he may be quite thick. I don’t mean to offend him, but listen to my reasoning…..you whine about arguing, about doing so little together, about not putting each other first etc etc, yet, I allow you back, and we go right back to where we were. When I remind you of this fact you then make excuses, like we’re always going to argue or we don’t like the same things, it’s not such a bad thing is it… “Are you actually f…………laming serious. Had you the knowledge, intellect or basic common sense and not been so wrapped in yourself, this is something that could have been considered on the morning of the 14th July 2016, instead you walked out in the afternoon, feeling hard done by, not listened to and unloved. Yet you had the answers already…
So what happens next, who knows. We are back together, though not actually living together and I have a gut feeling there’s more to this story than I’ve been told. But that means I’m making things more difficult through my lack of mistrust. And my anger remains. My answer…..DEAL WITH IT OR DO WHAT YOU DO BEST, LEAVE. Damn that anger bud!
Keep smiling!
jaydymondblog 